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We finally booked our vacation — a week at the beach in late September. And I'll be honest: I dragged my feet. 

Part of it was FOMO. What if I commit to a week away and then something cool pops up that I'd hate to miss?

Part of it was financial insecurity. Spending money on leisure can feel… indulgent.

And part of it was emotional. Should I take time off? Have I really earned the right to step away for week of hanging with my husband, playing golf, and lounging on the beach?  

The answer, of course, is yes.
Heck yes.
Thank goodness I came to my senses and booked the damn trip. 

But I realized something: so many of the leaders I coach struggle with the exact same hesitation. Some even avoid scheduling a random day off here and there, as if PTO is a guilty pleasure — like the candy bars hidden in the pantry (or wherever you hide yours). 

And the data backs it up. According to the U.S. Travel Association, Americans leave up to 700 million vacation days unused every year. That's roughly 9.5 days of free, paid time left sitting on the table per employee. 

That's… wild. 

So, what's going on? And more importantly, how do you avoid becoming part of that statistic? 

Why Leaders Don't Take Time Off (Even When They Need It) 

Here are the most common reasons I see in coaching sessions: 

  • Workload & staffing pressure
    Fear of falling behind or burdening colleagues. 
  • Organizational culture
    "Always on" norms make PTO feel like a luxury instead of a standard practice. 
  • Unlimited PTO paradox
    When there's no benchmark, people take less time, not more. 
  • Lack of planning tools
    Many people simply don't plan their PTO, so it never happens. 

These barriers are real — but they're also solvable. 

How to Help Yourself (and the People You Love) Actually Take Time Off

Reframe PTO as part of your job performance

One of my favorite coaching lines:
Rest isn't a reward — it's a responsibility. 

  • Your brain needs recovery cycles to stay sharp. 
  • PTO protects long‑term performance, not just short‑term comfort. 
  • High performers take breaks strategically. 

This reframing alone reduces guilt.

Name the real fear

Most hesitation comes from one of four beliefs: 

  • "My team will struggle without me." 
  • "I'll fall behind." 
  • "People will think I'm not committed." 
  • "It's easier to just keep going." 

Once you identify the belief driving your behavior, it becomes solvable instead of vague. 

Build a simple PTO‑planningritual 

Structure removes emotion. Try: 

  • Pick your PTO dates at the start of each quarter. 
  • Block them on the calendar immediately. 
  • Tell your manager early. 
  • Create a handoff checklist. 

Suddenly PTO becomes a routine operational step, not a dramatic decision. 

Practice "micro‑delegation" before time off

If you worry about burdening others: 

  • Delegate one small task each week. 
  • Let the team practice functioning without you. 
  • Build confidence that things won't fall apart. 

This reduces the anxiety spike that comes with stepping away. 

Challenge the belief that being always available equals value

Push back on the hero mentality: 

  • Being indispensable is not the same as being effective. 
  • Sustainable leaders build systems, not dependency. 
  • Your team grows when you step back occasionally. 

This is especially important in healthcare and arts administration, where burnout is rampant. 

Set boundaries that make PTO feel safe

Try: 

  • A "no email" rule 
  • A designated backup person 
  • A short "return ramp" plan (first day back = catch‑up only) 

When the return feels manageable, the time off feels less scary. 

Use PTO to model healthy behavior for your team

Your team mirrors your habits. 

  • If you never take time off, they won't either. 
  • Taking PTO is part of creating a culture where people can thrive. 

Frontline managers, especially, set the tone. 

Start with one small step

Don't start with a week.
Start with a day.
Small wins build confidence and reduce emotional friction. 

Final Thought 

If you're sitting on a pile of unused PTO, ask yourself:
What story am I telling myself about the rest that I need and I've earned? 

And then — please — book the damn trip. 

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